Why is it that toddlers are so quick to spew out “NO” when you ask them to do something? I believe it is because toddlers have yet to be socially conditioned to put the wants and needs of someone else over their own desires.
I have always said “no” before saying “yes” out of me just being a difficult person, but as of late and as I get older when I say “no” it’s truly how I feel in a very Nene-esque fashion of “I said what I said”. Self-care has been a resounding theme so far in 2018 and I have to say that doing things that I do not want to do is how I put me first and take care of myself.
I also look at situations from an alternate perspective. I very rarely ask people to do things for me so when people ask me do things for them I always want to know the why? It can be something as simple as getting their mail, but WHY? I am not a self-less person but I am also not selfish. I appreciate and thrive on transparency. I don’t like things being sprung on me and I barely like spontaneity.
After I give a hard Heisman denied NO, I always look over my actions thinking damn maybe that was harsh to just say no but then I also think about the fact that if I said no then I truly didn’t want to do it. It’s out for doing things that you do not want to do. All that’s going to do is piss me off and make me the angry bitch that no one wants to be around. My mental health is far more important that anything anyone can ask me to do.
The catch 22 to all of it is that I could be missing out on all kinds of fun and experiences by potentially saying “no”. But I know myself and I am not all the way there on the “yes” train. Obviously, this is circumstantial. I’m not going to go to travel to Wakanda and not kick it with T’Challa because I said no to Shuri. That would just be idiotic!
On my journey towards self care maybe I will find a happy balance between “no” and “yes”.
Are you more of a “yes” person or a “no” person? (Come through pessimist :))
